Isnt suicide is sometimes the best answer?

no it is not --- it is so final --- indeed you never waken up --- but you will be letting a whole host of people down if you take this fork in the road --- most of all the child that you had despite difficulties --- that is life --- it may or may not have been difficult for your mother to bring you into the world --- but i feel sure she would be dissapointed at your mindset right now --- if you need help --- then you should ask for it --- costs nothing to ask --- you need a legup in life -- but you need to share your problems and not create them --- good luck